musings of a neurotic mind

i usually tend to say that tomorrow’s gonna be less bad. well, i am not so sure about that. after finishing my PhD, i guess i’m gonna end up unemployed. i can’t leave the country, and there aren’t too many opportunities here. that sucks big time and i am really starting to question my future. no, the future isn’t all bright and shiny like on tv. it’s like one of those short stories by Douglas Coupland in “Life After God” (1994):
I was in rush hour gridlock traffic in the middle of the three express lanes leaving the city when it happened. [...] I remember it was hard to breathe, like being in a sauna. And I remember a tractor-trailer rig smashing into my car and I remember my roof buckling, and then I was dead. (”The Wrong Sun”, 93-94)

i’m stuck inside my head. a huge pile of books i am supposed to read is lying next to me, but concentration and motivation is rather low right now. and still, i believe that tomorrow’s gonna be… less bad.

that’s my favorite quote from The Matrix. it can be applied to my work as well… i’m back in my usual routine, reading and writing and researching and stuff. sometimes i feel like i am cracking up… coming too close to the Real.

boy, i do love (power)rock ballads! they are highly inspiring and brighten up my mood almost any time i listen to them. what are the requirements to write a paper (dissertation)? a topic i am really interested in, sixpack of red bull and good music. couldn’t do without it…
np: Meat Loaf - Couldn’t Have Said It Better

and happy that yet another tuesday is over. i am about to order The Osbournes on DVD. after that, i’m gonna hit the sack. it’s about time.

after a good (?) night’s sleep i finally managed to run this blog using cgiwrap. yes, i am paranoid. *g*

blogger’s been unable to upload for more than a week now… and this sucks. so i decided to set up my own blog… *g*
everything’s still a little rough and needs polishing, including a template to fit into the rest of the site… unfortunately, i do not have time for this right now… maybe later this week.